The Breakdown
This poem first appeared in Boldly Mental, read the original here.
It wasn’t until
Months after my sister broke
down, that she told me
But why hide something
so big behind “I’m good, you?”
It felt like a slap
“You were far away”
(I’m always so far away)
I thought we were close
Or growing closer
Now that 10 years apart is
Not such a lifetime
We’re both grown adults
We were visiting our shared
College town in fall
I graduated
Years before, she was nearly
finished, a few weeks
She didn’t like it;
Not nearly as much as me
Suddenly she said,
“Last spring, this is where
My neighbor called the police.
I had been screaming.”
They admitted her
She was seeing, hearing things
Did a psych eval
Our mom and dad came
I was teaching in Asia
I wasn’t informed
Our family is like
that, full of secrets unsaid
It’s easy to be
blindsided by it
Walking in Appalachia
On a cold fall day
She said she’s better
But that she’s ready to leave
The bubble of school
I didn’t push it
Or even tell her I was
disappointed that
They didn’t want me
to know, or help, or comfort
Completely shut out
What else don’t I know?
Withheld on purpose
Or by omission
